Monday, May 17, 2010

Things I've learned along the way, Part #1

1. Unshaven legs, granny panties, sweaty after a workout…it doesn’t matter, guys still want to have sex with you.

2. My kids adjust so much better after a weekend with their dad if I let them play with their friends when they get home instead of making them get ready for the week ahead. It’s a total inconvenience on me, but if it keeps them from crying, moaning and complaining when they first walk in the door, I’m willing to make the sacrifice.

3. I am not a number. I am a human being with feelings. My weight, bank balance, number of FaceBook friends, and contacts in my phone do not define me.

4. He is my ex-husband for a reason. Why do I have to continue to put myself in situations that allow him to hurt me in order to be reminded of this?

5. Never eat a banana while shopping the aisles of the Home Depot on a Saturday morning. Don’t ask…just trust me on this one.

6. Men (and women for that matter) that wear sunglasses while indoors are total douches and can never be trusted.

7. Age is not necessarily an indicator of maturity. In fact, I have found that most men, no matter the age, 20’s, 30’s, 40’s and 50’s are always going on 15.

8. Failure is not the end result as long as you learned something and grew in the process.

9. Don’t live life based on the “shoulds” and “what if’s”. It can only lead to disappointment.

10. If humor is not the number one thing on your “list” for the opposite sex, then you should re-evaluate your list. It’s not always going to be ice cream, bunnies, and lollipops, but if you don’t have laughter then you are already starting behind the pack.


  1. AMEN!!

    Just the other night I saw a douche in shades at McDonald's. He wasn't inside, but it was O'Dark:30!


    And humor is definitely a must-have. Life's too short!

  2. Love the list! And to #3 I would add number of blog readers. That really gets me down some days. I have a small following, and I've decided to stop trying to write for other people. I'll write for myself.

  3. I. Hate. Indoor shade wearers. I mean, seriously, are you afraid someone will recognize you and hound you because you're just that cool??? I also have a tiny issue with people who not only pop their (pink) polo collars but then wear their sunglasses on the back of their head. Why not just wear a sign that says "I'm a Huge Tool"??

  4. Great list. Very important lessons indeed.

  5. All very true! Love coming here for a few laughs and some reality. You tell it like it is - no worries - no political correctness. I love it!

  6. Fabulous list. I agree about the sunglasses...take them off already.

    I've found that if I let my son play when he gets home from school, instead of making him get started on his homework right away, he does better. Similar to letting your kids play when they get home. Maybe it just lets them process everything.

  7. I'll trust you on the banana at home depot one...all though I have to admit my imagination is running wild with the one...oh the possibilities for bananas at Home depot!

    Great list! I loved it!

  8. Ok seriously I can relate to many on this list, especially the kids after a weekend with Dad, oooo don't get me started!

    Totally LMAO reading this cuz it's SOOOO darn true!

  9. Thanks for pointing out # 3, sometimes I forget it myself.

    I also loved your list, it is very perceptive while still keeping the funny and I agree with you about so much of it.



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