It is 10:15am and it is already one of those days. You know, the kind when nothing seems to be going your way. I hate these kinds of days. These days are few and far between, thank God, but when they do happen, I struggle to get through them with a smile on my face. However, today is going to be different…I’m going to complain about it here on my blog and then I’m choosing to move on and not let it get me down. I will continue on as if today were the best day ever and see how that works for me!
So here is the lowdown…
2:00am- computer starts making weird noises, I secretly wish the noises would go away, but it doesn’t work. I get up to turn it off…I hate interrupted sleep in the middle of the night.
3:07am- alarm mysteriously goes off…this must be Gibson’s payback for making him sit in time out yesterday. (mental note, never put Gibson in time out close to my alarm clock)
5:17am- the last time I remember looking at the clock before falling into a deep sleep
6:30am- alarm goes off for the official start to my day and I can’t seem to get my butt out of bed
7:15am- I drag myself into the shower and realize that the conditioner and soap that I had bought the day before are still on my dresser
7:18am- the shower water turns completely cold (note, I still have a head full of shampoo)…this sucks, must complete shower with ice cold water.
7:22am- hop out of completely cold shower only to remember that clean towels are still on the dryer downstairs.
8:10am- Electricity goes out, right in the middle of drying my thick ass hair…put hair in semi wet ponytail and head to work.
8:45am- arrive to work fifteen minutes late
9:02am- crack a smile when I realize that my boss won’t be in until after lunch
9:37am- Log in to Face Book to get my morning fill on all of my friends…only to find (2) friends have had babies, (1) crush is in a relationship, and (1) ex boyfriend is engaged to be married…all within the last 24 hours…
Seriously, could this really be happening? How come when my life seems to be on a bobsled ride to nowhere, my friends lives seem to be on an uphill swing to funville? It just doesn’t seem fair. Not that life is fair, believe me, I, of all people, am completely aware that life is not fair. I guess I’m not really asking for fair, I’m just asking for a break, a break in the mundane of being a hardworking single mom trying to raise two awesome boys. When do I get that payoff? When do I get to be happy and have fun? When is it my time to get what I want out of life?
Don’t get me wrong…I am so happy for these changes in my friends lives. My friends that are having babies have both struggled for years to have babies and I couldn’t be happier…but it secretly makes me want to have another baby, I can’t help it, it just does! My “crush”, that is in a relationship, is like a stab in the back. We have been out a few times but were just at different stages in our lives…his stage, you might ask…he didn’t want to be in a relationship, he wanted to just go out and have fun…six months later he is in a relationship. My ex-boyfriend…one of the many reasons we broke up is because he says he isn’t the marrying kind…two years later he is engaged to be married…huh, clearly he is the marrying kind!
It just doesn’t make sense…life doesn’t make sense. How come we always want what we can’t have and then when we finally get what we want, we find out it’s not really what we wanted? Is life really intended to be this hard…this complicated? Maybe it is and I am just not willing to accept that yet. I guess I have no choice but to plow through day by day and enjoy the good things that I have as well as the good things that may come my way…because the reality is that life is way to short to sit back and just let it pass me by.
Ok...that's it...that rant is over...here is to better days ahead...nothing but smiles from here on out!