Here it is, Thursday, March 11th, early in the morning. I’m a little teary eyed. Teary eyed because in less than 24 hours it will be Friday, March 12th. And Friday, March 12th will be the 39th anniversary of my birth. This year is bittersweet! It’s bittersweet because it means I have exactly 1 year, or 365 days, or 8,760 hours to NOT become who my childhood self thought my mom was at forty, and that is OLD!
Don’t get me wrong…I am ready to embrace my 40’s, after all, it’s the new 30’s, right?
I feel good, I’ve had a good life, I have AMAZING friends, an awesome family, and two kick ass sons! I’m NOT complaining, not one bit.
Oh, who am kidding? Of course I’m going to complain, a little. Come to think of it, I only have one small, minute complaint, and in true He Who Laughs Last form, I’m going to take that one small, minute complaint, or what I like to call “a mole hill” and make a “mountain” out of it.
I’m almost 40 people! I’m not dead! This is a wake-up call for single men in their 40’s. It would appear that most of you in my age range, don’t like me. Not “me” personally, but me as a representative of my demographic. It seems to me that the forty to forty-five year old man finds women of my age undesirable.
I get it, I see why you may find women in my age bracket so undesirable. I get that you have probably dated some that are angry, bitter, cynical and a bit jaded. You have probably dated your fair share of women who have never been married and are hearing their clocks tick. You have probably dated many that are newly divorced and bitter. I really do get it. I get that you would rather not deal with them. So you think you have no choice but to date those women that are much younger than you because they can just have fun and are not worried about their biological clock...yet, or haven’t been jaded by divorce.
But trust me, one day these younger, more exciting women will wake up and hear their clock ticking, and you will be fifty. Face it! It's a reality you will have to deal with eventually.
So, as the clock strikes twelve and the sun arises in the morning I know I will be stepping even further into this group of falsely perceived women otherwise known as “desperate”, because I will awake as a 39 year old woman closer to forty than I ever dreamed I would be. It may be a rough day, but it will be no fault of my own because thirty-nine is just a number and I won’t let it define me, even though you might. I am so much more than that.
So “Mr. Confused” don’t count me out. Don’t include me in that group of women you are so scared of. Give me a chance, because I just may surprise you. I’ve grown. I’ve become the woman I never thought I could be. I’m not bitter, jaded, or pissed. I’m just me!
One more thought… if numbers are important to you then I suggest you wake up and smell the coffee pretty soon, and by soon I mean in the next 366days, because in exactly one year and one day my “number” will be even bigger and scarier to you!