Friday, November 12, 2010

News Flash

I am off the dating market...officially!

Woot! Woot! I never thought this day would come.

No, no...I'm not doing anything drastic like listing myself as "in a relationship" on Facebook or anything like that.

Heck, I haven't even met Mr. Wonderful yet.

Let's just say, I am flat out tired of looking for Mr. Wonderful. In fact, I'm almost convinced that he doesn't even exist. I'm definitely convinced that men my age aren't looking for a solid woman, with a good head on her shoulders who is independent, both financially and emotionally, who owns her own home, has no ex baggage and has great kids. No, no...I'm convinced that they all like the drama and the baggage, because I don't have either and I can't seem to find a good guy.

Obviously, I'm attracting the wrong guys and it makes me tired!

Rest assured thought, I haven't given up hope that he will show up on my doorstep one day, and when he does, I will welcome him with open arms. But for now...I'm taking a break looking for him.

I know this new revelation will probably hamper my blog material for a while, and for that, I am sorry. Quite honestly, the thought of another first date just makes me want to throw the covers over my head and hibernate for the winter.

For those of you that are not single, you may not remember what it's like to date. So I thought I would share with you the differences in inner dialogue that men and women go through on a first date. Hopefully this will give you a better glance into my life and you will understand why I just can't do it anymore.

The first minute of inner dialogue for a man on the first date:
Wow! She is pretty. This could be fun.

The first minute of inner dialogue for a woman on a first date:
Wow! he is handsome. This could be fun. I wonder how my hair looks. I hate my smile. I wish I would have worn a different color lip gloss or at least whitened my teeth another day. I hope my butt doesn't look big in this dress. I hope he talks. I will not think about my ex! Man, he smells so nice. Do I smell nice? I wonder if he wants a relationship or if he is just out dating for fun. Stop thinking about the Ex. I hope he calls me tomorrow. What if he doesn't call me tomorrow? I hope he likes my shoes. If he compliments my shoes, I will be happy. My Ex used to compliment my shoes. Does my breath stink? What if he tries to kiss me? I hope he tries to kiss me. What if he doesn't try to kiss me? Dang it, why did I wear this underwear? What if he doesn't like me? Will I be able to tell if he doesn't like me? I wonder what my Ex would say if he saw us together right now? Did I change the sheets on my bed? I hope he pays for dinner. Doh...I can't believe I just chipped my nail polish. Mental note, find a new place to get nails done...and on and on and on it goes.

Now do you see why I am so tired?

2 comments:

  1. That was hysterical, and horrifically too TRUE!! So, that said...good for you. You take yourself right off that market. Enjoy your happy time free of douche bags.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I'm with you. Totally done with dating, or at least trying so hard at it. It. Is. Exhausting. Not to mention humiliating!

    ReplyDelete

 

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