Sunday, May 22, 2011

So I was at a party this weekend with some friends. I didn’t really want to go. The thought of being a homebody this weekend had been weighing heavily on me all week. I was looking so forward to spending Saturday and Sunday with me, myself and I. But a couple of my friends wouldn’t let that happen. Their theory is that if I don’t get out there in the world and mingle, then I will never meet Mr. Right.

They had a good point, so I decided to go.

Of course, I didn’t know anyone at the party, except for the two people that I went with. But that has never stopped me. I’ve never been a wall flower. I can strike up a conversation with anyone and convince you at the same time that I am interested in nothing other than the one on one we are having.

Yeah, it’s a gift…don’t hate me!

Anyway, there was this particularly good looking guy eyeing me by the fireplace. And you all know me well enough by now to know that I was not going to make a move. I figure, if he is interested in getting to know me then he will come over and make the first move. Andy by golly, he did.

But much to my dismay, it ended quicker than it began. Here is our brief 30 second conversation…

Him: Hi, my name is Brian, what is your name?

Me: I’m Julie.

Him: It’s great to meet you Julie. I’ve been watching you all night and your smile really got to me. I couldn’t leave without coming over to introduce myself.

Me: Well, it’s nice to meet you Brian. What do you do for a living?

Him: I’m a firefighter.

Me: (suddenly losing interest and finding it difficult to hold back the look of disappointment on my face). That’s a very noble profession.

Him: You don’t sound too excited about my profession.

Me: Oh I am, it's just that I’ve had a go around or two with a fireman lately.

Him: Well, was he gorgeous and single like me?

Me: He was definitely gorgeous, and he said he was single…so yeah, I guess you could say he is gorgeous and single. But enough about him, tell me more about you.

Him: I save lives…what more do you want to know?

Me: (stunned silent)…

It’s no wonder I’m still single


  1. What a douchebag! Ego's...uggghhhhh!

  2. OMG, Anon stole my comment right out of my head!! I wonder if his douchebaggery works on many women. Well, actually, I guess not or he wouldn't be single, right? Ugh!



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