Ask me for my photo

Ok...so I will be the first one to admit that dating when I was younger was much easier than dating now. Maybe it wasn't really easier, maybe I was just overflowing with so much self confidence and spunk back then that it didn't seem like it was all that difficult. I always seemed to have dates back then...my Friday and Saturday nights were planned early in the week and always eventful.

Twenty years ago I hung out with my friends and met new people all of the time. I met boys at football and basketball games, or by hanging out at the mall or the pool on the weekends. Those were the days when we actually got phone calls from boys, not text messages or emails. We didn't have to meet them on dating websites or social networks. It just seemed so much easier back then!

Dare I say it? Those were the good old days!

Here I am, twenty years later, a prime example of everything I was afraid of becoming. I'm divorced. I'm a single mom. I'm twenty pounds heavier and frustrated with where my life has taken me. No more confidence, no more spunk...struggling to be someone other than who I have been the last ten years, a wife and a mom! How do I transition from wife and mom, to confident, happy go lucky single woman with kids? And how do I do this without leaving the comfort of my own home? That, my friends, brings me to the internet and dating websites!

The difficult part with these dating websites and social networks is it always seems to be the same mix of people. The same people "winking" at me and sending me messages. The same people "computer flirting" with me. The same people day after day after day. It gets boring, frustrating, and irritating all at the same time.

So one day, I decided to take matters into my own hands and I expanded my search criteria on a dating website. I expanded my criteria farther than I ever thought I would. I ended up in the "ask me for my photo" area of the dating website. These "ask me for my photo" people are people that fall into one of four categories. Either they are the ugliest of the ugly, the hottest of the hot, those that haven't yet figured out how to edit their ex-girlfriend/wives out of their best photos, or those who are so technologically challenged that they can't figure out how to get their photos from their camera to the computer.

The most difficult challenge with this is that I have no way of differentiating between any of these groups of people. All I know is that the hottest of the hot have already turned me down or ignored my request at communicating and the ugliest of the ugly won't leave me alone. Therefore, I am faced with another lonely night of cuddling with myself on the couch watching a Bridget Jones movie, stuffing my face with Ben and Jerry's Rocky Road ice cream, knowing sooner or later I am going to have to ask for a picture. Of course, it is possible that this "ask me for my photo" guy is a great guy that is just sick of the wrong people overloading his inbox. Like I said, the "ask me for my photo" profile is the ultimate in high stakes online dating! This makes me want to put my theory to the test! I needed a game plan!

So here is what I did. I searched the website for a late thirty something guy about 30 miles away looking to date someone like me between the ages of 35 and 40. It didn't take me long to find him. He was 6'2 (as all my friends know, I have serious issues with the height of a man), athletic and toned with blue eyes. The kicker, he stated in his profile that his only deal breaker was "mutual physical attraction is a must". Any guy who says that has got to be fairly good looking, right? Bingo...Brad007 was my tester! So I decided to go against everything I believe in and sent him an email. Guess what? I was right about my theory all along! Do you know how I know? Because hot guys never write me back!

And that, my friends, is where my new life as a single dating woman with kids began!