Open Letter, the Dating Version

Dear Ex(s),

No, I did not delete you or block you from my Facebook account. Quite frankly, I’m tired of Facebook and deactivated my page last week, but that’s not the point of this letter. The point of this letter, is to remind you that you dumped me. And when you dump me you no longer have the right to know what I am doing, or see what I am up to, or look at my pictures. You lost that privilege when you chose to move on!

Sincerely,

You snooze you loose
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Dear Suitor,

I don’t really care if it was one of my dear friends that recommended we connect. If the 2nd word in your initial email to me is the word “seen” and the first word is “I”, as in “I seen that you and I….” I can tell you it won’t happen between the two of us. I’m not a grammar snob by any means, but “I seen” is just too hilljack for my liking.

Sincerely,
A Dating Snob

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Dear Recent Date,

I don’t know how else to say this, but I’m not interested.

Sincerely,
Read the clues

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Dear You Know Who You Are,

I’m sorry! I wish you would give me a chance to explain better. What you “heard” me say is not what I was “trying to say”. Oh, and when I said you couldn’t come over, the real reason didn’t have anything to do with my dad…

Sincerely,
Please let me explain

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Dear Instant Gratification Girl,

Good things come to those who wait!

Sincerely,
Patience is a virtue
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