2. As I get older, I wish there was some sort of roll over plan for all of those naps that I took as a child.
3. After watching several crime dramas, I am convinced that serial killers only attack women with matching bras and panties. Feeling overly confident that a serial killer would not be interested in me.
4. The friends that tell me what I NEED to hear are the ones I am keeping into the new year, not the ones who tell me what I WANT to hear.
5. Hamilton and Gibson think I am the meanest mom in the world because they can never find anything in a souvenir shop with their name on it.
6. I used to be that girl who thought things through in my head before I said them out loud, however, the older I get the more I've become like my mom. I now believe that the thoughts in my head sometimes get bored and end up taking a leisurely stroll out of my mouth.
7. It is so cold in the Midwest that I think I accidentally keyed my own car with my nipples this morning.
8. The list of "things not to say in 2014 if you are over 30" recently came out. Amazeballs was on that list. I am 42. I will not be able to stop saying it. Sorry friends.
